How to Prepare for your First Mediation

Article written by Pippa Colman Family Law

Considerations with Mediation Services

A common question we receive is ‘how do I prepare for mediation?’.

At its core, mediation is a form of family dispute resolution that is a facilitated discussion where the mediator (an independent third party) helps you and the other parties discuss the issues, come up with ideas, and hopefully, form an agreement about how you will handle those issues, without going to court. Mediation might be about parenting, or property matters, or a combination, and the way you prepare for a mediation may be a little different.

Legal Requirements and Mediation Services

There might be some legal requirements that need to be complied with, such as preparing a “Mediation Position Paper”, obtaining valuations, consulting Family Report Writers or other experts that will assist in identifying and understanding the issues in dispute in your matter. All of these things are designed to help you narrow down the problems, and to ensure you and the other parties have all the required information before the mediation, optimising time at the mediation and allowing a clear understanding of the matter from all parties including legal representation.

How to Prepare for Mediation

Mediation is a discussion. You can help yourself feel better prepared for a mediation by: -

1. Writing out a list of things that are important to you, such as: -

a) The time you might want to spend with children;

b) Important dates or events you might have planned;

c) Items of a property pool that you may wish to keep (e.g. car, home, superannuation, particular gifts, etc).

2. Identifying “wants” versus “needs”. What do you need/what do you want? It is important you are clear on what things are “deal breakers” and what things you would prefer but may be able to live without;

3. Attend counselling or psychology sessions beforehand and plan to attend after. Mediations are difficult because they are conversations that often people have been nervous about having. Obtaining some guidance from a trained professional can help you understand the difficulties you might face and equip you with some skills to fall back on during the mediation if you need;

4. Have good accurate information about the value of bank accounts, motor vehicles, superannuation and other items, and try to get all your disclosable information put together several weeks before going to the mediation. Taking a screenshot/providing a recent statement on the morning of the mediation can help avoid any last minute disputes about the value of an item;

5. Know where to be and when. Make sure you ask your legal representation about where the mediation is taking place and how to get there. You might even want to plan ahead a few days before so you know where to park, and how to get to the venue. It’ll help reduce those “morning of” nerves; and

6. Ask questions. If you are unsure about anything, or want to know more about it before mediation, ask your legal representation (or seek legal advice) before attending so you can go into the mediation with a clear plan, and a goal in mind;

7. Obtaining advice from your accountant or financial planner (if required) before attending mediation is important. Advice from skilled financial advisors will give you a better picture of what you can/ cannot afford to make an arrangement for;

8. Investigate your borrowing power before the mediation;

9. Depending on the complexity of the property you are dealing with, there may be serious tax or stamp duty consequences for making an arrangement which cannot be given effect under the Family Law Act.

Aiming for Settlement

Mediation is about reducing conflict; working together to find a solution; reducing the time, effort, and expense the parties require to resolve a disagreement between them. We recommend a mediation to all of our clients because it is an opportunity for you to take control of the outcome of your dispute without needing to resort to litigation, which can be expensive and tiring.

Mediation may not always work, but it is always worth investigating.  To increase your chances of achieving settlement, Pippa Colman family law strongly recommends you:

1. Do, seek legal advice before going to mediation;

2. Do, have a plan for how you want to approach the mediation (go in with a few draft offers that you would be happy with to begin with) and know where your bottom line is;

3. Do, get advice from your accountant/ financial planner/ broker /parenting coordinator/counsellor;

4. Do, (for parenting mediations) have a clear understanding of the schedule for the children/ yourself. Things like special days, holiday dates, travelling, work commitments;

5. Do, take notes and make a clear record of the ideas that you come up with;

6. Do, focus on the bigger problem and how to resolve it;

7. Do, go into the negotiation with a clear idea of what you want to achieve from it;

8. Do, go in with the intention of settling the matter.

Find out more about mediation services with Pippa Colman lawyers today.